Aug 19, 2004

nothing of import

It’s an amazing week at the Laurelhurst Theater. I might have to spend all week there.
My tail is wagging. What is it about stuff like that?
I swear, it takes so little sometimes to turn my mood that I can hardly stand it.
I was thinking about this the other day. What are the ridiculous little things that make my me bounce and my skin feel soft with happiness?
Movies and beer at a walking distance. Thunderstorms. Trader Joes. Big Pillows. Greyhounds. Six Feet Under. Salmon. Tunnels and Caves. Hot springs. Forehead kisses A caress on the neck.
These aren’t deep moving things. They aren’t like close friends and great films and big accomplishments and wonderful books and large bodies of natural water or the open sky and true love. They aren’t what drive me and make me think and hope.
But man oh man, come at me an invitation for a day by the river and a six pack or a night of serious fort building and good old rented movies or a stroll on a warm night or a great book and I can hear the “ahhhhhhhh” escape from me.
When I was younger, it was a good swim and a better paddle. It was a Vonnegut book. It was red dwarf and the young ones and new wave music. It was fritos. It was watching wrestling with my grandma while eating takeout deli sandwiches. It was bantering with the cute boy until we both stalked off.
I need to write these things down and laminate them. Keep them in my back pocket for moments of frustration.I can pursue things in my life that bring depth and meaning and beauty to my existence but one can’t expect to find moment of movement with ongoing frequency. Not every moment can be falling in love or finding the cure or seeing great beauty or even great sex. To expect as much would just result in too much disappointment. But recalling the ease in which giddy satisfaction to be had can really cut down the therapy bill.

1 comment:

Bjetsey said...

hear hear! I agree. I think that I will try and think of all the things that make me giddy with happiness. that's a good coping strat.