Aug 29, 2006

All I could was smile. I smiled all the way to the post office, right past the girl who cut me off and I smiled on the way back, even when I got the annoying call and itch on the back of my throat. When I lost that grin I glanced at it again and I kept smiling.
I don't know why I was smiling.
I mean, really, I've been so prone ot fits of sadness lately. I cry at greeting card commercials, I sit and stare at the things I need to leave behind but I can't divert my eyes and can't get myself to move and can't myself to let go of those who require so much tension I am practically shaking at the limbs from exhaustion. I get let down and a mull on it and try to figure out who next time, next time I can do it right. I focus.
And then I had something new to look at. And it had my grinning like the cat that ate the canary. Not a smirk. Not a grin. A smile.
Smiling, smiling, smiling at the simplest gesture. The funniest expression. That certain understanding.
Something I had forgotten. A beautiful sunset and a knowing look and a touch you can depend on and something that makes you so happy to look at it that you forget to be happy about it being close enough to touch.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

it sounds like menopause

daff0dil said...

umm, no
but thanks for playing