Aug 29, 2006

All I could was smile. I smiled all the way to the post office, right past the girl who cut me off and I smiled on the way back, even when I got the annoying call and itch on the back of my throat. When I lost that grin I glanced at it again and I kept smiling.
I don't know why I was smiling.
I mean, really, I've been so prone ot fits of sadness lately. I cry at greeting card commercials, I sit and stare at the things I need to leave behind but I can't divert my eyes and can't get myself to move and can't myself to let go of those who require so much tension I am practically shaking at the limbs from exhaustion. I get let down and a mull on it and try to figure out who next time, next time I can do it right. I focus.
And then I had something new to look at. And it had my grinning like the cat that ate the canary. Not a smirk. Not a grin. A smile.
Smiling, smiling, smiling at the simplest gesture. The funniest expression. That certain understanding.
Something I had forgotten. A beautiful sunset and a knowing look and a touch you can depend on and something that makes you so happy to look at it that you forget to be happy about it being close enough to touch.


Anonymous said...

it sounds like menopause

daff0dil said...

umm, no
but thanks for playing