Jul 12, 2005

beeswax

OK, so anyone who knows me knows I have some strong opinions.
Additionally, I have my own preferences, needs, priorities, tastes. Who doesn't. But as my life become more and more a niche circus, I have made it my business to try to NOT be an enormous pain the ass. or, at least, to soften the blow of my special needs and to not burden anyone with the background ideology if they do not solicit the conversation.

I don't lecture. I don't stare unpointedly. I usually don't even really care.
I guess my point is: I don't like to make people feel uncomfortable or feel bad. I am not here to teach anyone how to be happier or more conscientious, either, be it to me or the human race in general.
And while I am apt, in my professional or public realm, to support a cause, educate in general, or work to an end, I wouldn't ever bring that baggage with me to an interpersonal gathering.
A such, you wont find me with a "go vegan" flag at a dinner party, and I wont ask for an ingredients list or ask if your salmon is farmed. You recycle? great! You don't, well, that's your decision. Last night you attended a large furry's orgy? Supercool, I easily overheat and prefer lingerie, myself.
You get it.

For the most part other people's lives are their own business, and any interactions short of cruel or hateful are fine. Especially if I am a guest.
I feel it is the least bit of social grace that I, as an awkward person, can employ into my social interactions.

So, with that being said, and recognizing the strident and proselytizing reputation many people who share my ideologies have, I am fascinated at how often people try to lecture me, publicly comment or pigeonhole me, and in general can't seem to mind their own business.
I would never, ever, bother to care about someone's charbroiled burger, or job at Nike, or dull and sad loveless marriage.
So why is it that people feel completely comfortable commenting on what I do or don't eat, are fine poking and prodding at my desire to work in a particular sector of my field, or continue to make jokes about how I choose to conduct my personal life?

6 comments:

Bjetsey said...

could be that they had siblings? and they're used to poking and proding without need or reason other than to provoke?
just saying.

Dave said...

That's easy. They are assholes.

daff0dil said...

both reasonable theories

daff0dil said...

to be clear, I'm all for teasing, but...

Bjetsey said...

well yeah, if they're acting like dicks, then I'm siding with Dave. If they are provoking to provoke, then I'm going with the sibling/immature theory.

Anonymous said...

I just feel like saying this. I'm a vegetarian going on 10 years, and I think that ex-vegetarians are incredibly sexy when they're eating meat.