Jul 15, 2012

I had this really beautiful blog post planned around integrating who you were and what you wanted to be when you were young and green with who and what you grow to love and respect as you embrace maturity.

It was about the formation of who you are in the little wants and fantasies of youth. The importance of such details in the face of not getting to be a firefighter or a ballerina or an earth saving activist. It was about keeping those thoughts in mind and in check, remembering the source of the thrill as possibility moved you. It had a piece about the relationships you build in youth vs maturity, and questions about the modern world,  our tendency to move more and more, and how having to create a a whole new life and circle might further alienate you from your initial aim. For better or worse.

I even had a metaphor, about building a house and all that jazz, and I lost it.
I lost it because I experienced an emotional moment on the way to blogger... a jolt of rejection that forced me to put into perspective the nature of who I am and what my personal relationships ...

These things happen

And now this is, very simply, a post about the tempestuous nature of emotions and how I very much wish it wasn't so easy to change a focus or a mood, sometimes. How I wish my skin was thicker and my head less swayed by the sounds around town.

A funny thing happened on the way to the forum, kids, I accidentally lost my point while I was being duped into buying a clue.

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